Did you know, on average we spend 26 years sleeping in our lives, so it’s to be expected that people have a lot to say about it. From funny to inspiring, and wise words from Shakespeare himself, here are 100+ quotes about sleep.
Funny Sleep Quotes
- “I love sleep. My life has the tendency to fall apart when I’m awake, you know?” – Ernest Hemingway
- “There is no sunrise so beautiful that it is worth waking me up to see it.” – Mindy Kaling
- “Never waste any time you can spend sleeping.” – Frank H. Knight
- “Laugh and the world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone.” – Anthony Burgess
- “If you’re going to do something tonight that you’ll be sorry for in the morning, sleep late.” – Henny Youngman
- “Nothing cures insomnia like the realization that it’s time to get up.” – Anonymous
- “There is a time for many words, and there is also a time for sleep.” – Homer
- “It is a common experience that a problem difficult at night is resolved in the morning after the committee of sleep has worked on it.” – John Steinbeck
- “There is no hope for a civilization which starts each day to the sound of an alarm clock.” – Anonymous
- “Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.” – Phyllis Diller
- Who said nights were for sleep? Marilyn Monroe
- When people tell me “You’re going to regret that in the morning”, I sleep in until noon because I’m a problem solver. Unknown
- We used to sleep five to a bed and three of them used to wet the bed. I learnt to swim before I could walk. Bernard Manning
- Those who snore always fall asleep first. Unknown
- They call it the American Dream because you have to be asleep to believe it. George Carlin
- There is no sunrise so beautiful that it is worth waking me up to see it. Mindy Kaling
- There are two types of people in this world, good and bad. The good sleep better, but the bad seem to enjoy the waking hours much more. Woody Allen
- The lion and the calf shall lie down together, but the calf won’t get much sleep. Woody Allen
- The amount of sleep required by the average person is five minutes more. Wilson Mizener
- Some people talk in their sleep. Lecturers talk while other people sleep. Albert Camus
- Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong. George Carlin
- Sleep when your baby sleeps. Everyone knows this classic tip, but I say why stop there? Scream when your baby screams. Take Benadryl when your baby takes Benadryl. And walk around pantless when your baby walks around pantless. Tina Fey
- Sleep is like a cat: It only comes to you if you ignore it. Gillian Flynn
- People who say they sleep like a baby usually don’t have one. Leo J. Burke
- No civilized person goes to bed the same day he gets up. Richard Harding Davis
- Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. Dave Barry
- My mother told me to follow my dreams, so I took a nap. Unknown
- Many things – such as loving, going to sleep, or behaving unaffectedly – are done worst when we try hardest to do them. C. S. Lewis
- Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone. Anthony Burgess
- Late last night I slew my wife, Stretched her on the parquet flooring; I was loathe to take her life, But I had to stop her snoring! Harry Graham
- If you’re going to do something tonight that you’ll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late. Henry Youngman
- If you are a student you should always get a good night’s sleep unless you have come to the good part of your book, and then you should stay up all night and let your schoolwork fall by the wayside, a phrase which means ‘flunk’. Lemony Snicket
- I’ve always envied people who sleep easily. Their brains must be cleaner, the floorboards of the skull well swept, all the little monsters closed up in a steamer trunk at the foot of the bed. David Benioff
- I’m trying to read a book on how to relax, but I keep falling asleep. Jim Loy
- I think sleeping was my problem in school. If school had started at four in the afternoon, I’d be a college graduate today. George Foreman
- I love to sleep. Do you? Isn’t it great? It really is the best of both worlds. You get to be alive and unconscious. Rita Rudner
- I love sleep. My life has the tendency to fall apart when I’m awake, you know? Ernest Hemingway
- Happiness is waking up, looking at the clock and finding that you still have two hours left to sleep. Charles M. Schulz
- Everyone should have kids. They are the greatest joy in the world. But they are also terrorists. You’ll realize this as soon as they are born and they start using sleep deprivation to break you. Ray Romano
- Early to rise, early to bed, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and dead. James Thurber
- Early to bed and early to rise probably indicates unskilled labor. John Ciardi
- Dreaming permits each and every one of us to be quietly and safely insane every night of our lives. William Charles Dement
- Better to sleep with a sober cannibal than a drunk Christian. Herman Melville
- A professor is someone who talks in someone else’s sleep. W. H. Auden
- A day without a nap is like a cupcake without frosting. Terri Guillemets
- “I’m going to bed” really means “I’m going to lie in my bed and go on my phone”. Unknown
- "In the morning you beg to sleep more, in the afternoon you are dying to sleep, and at night you refuse to sleep.""
Unknown" - "Why do they call it beauty sleep when you wake up looking terrible?""
Unknown" - “People say ""go big or go home"" like going home is a bad thing. Heck yeah I want to go home, and I'll have a nap when I get there.""
Unknown" - “Just once I'd like to wake up, turn on the news, and hear ""Monday has been cancelled,"" and then go back to sleep.""
Unknown" - “I was gonna take over the world today but I overslept. Postponed, again""
Unknown" - “I believe there should be a better way to start each day... instead of waking up every morning.""
Unknown" - “I'm so good at sleeping that I can do it with my eyes closed.""
Unknown" - "The future is shaped by your dreams, so stop wasting time and go to sleep!" Unknown
- “He's so lazy that if there were work in bed, he would rather sleep on the floor." Unknown
- “I'm off to club bed, featuring DJ Pillow and MC Blanky."
Unknown - “Me and my bed are perfect for each other, but my alarm clock keeps trying to break us up." - Unknown
- “When I'm at work I can fall asleep instantly, but when I'm in my bed I can hardly fall asleep." - Unknown
- “Don't give up on your dreams so soon, sleep longer." - Unknown
- “I lost my teddy bear, can I sleep with you?" - Unknown
- “At night, I can't fall asleep. In the morning, I can't get up." - Unknown
- “In the morning I can't eat, I'm thinking of you. In the evening I can't eat, I'm thinking of you. In the night I can't sleep.. I'm so hungry!" - Unknown
- “When people tell me ""You're going to regret that in the morning,"" I sleep in until noon because I'm a problem solver." - Unknown
- “My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do." - Unknown
- “I always say ""morning"" instead of ""good morning"", because if it was a good morning, I'd still be asleep." - Unknown
- “Me: We need to fall asleep. Brain: No, let's stay awake and think about every decision we made today." - Unknown
- “I want to sleep but my brain won't stop talking to itself." - Unknown
- “I wish I was a kid again so everyone would be proud of me for taking a long nap." - Unknown
- “Those who snore always fall asleep first." - Unknown
- “I have 206 bones, 650 muscles and 50 billion cells in my body. It takes time to wake up all of them up in the morning." - Unknown
- “When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep - not screaming, like the passengers in his car." - Unknown
- You know what part I like about waking up early? None.. let me go back to sleep." - Unknown
- “Dear sleep, I'm sorry we broke up this morning. I want you back!" - Unknown
- “Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night." - Dave Barry
- “Dear sleep: thanks for trying, but you can't beat surfing the net." - Unknown
- “I don't need a hair stylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning." - Unknown
- "Dreaming permits each and every one of us to be quietly and safely insane every night of our lives." - William Charles Dement
- “Don't wake me up! I'm studying." - Unknown
- “I'm a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep a lot." - Unknown
- "I tried counting sheep so I can fall asleep but that got boring, so I started talking to the shepherd instead." - Unknown
- "My daily routine. Morning: Feeling tired, cranky and lazy. Afternoon: I could go for a nap. Night: I can't sleep." - Unknown
- “People who can fall asleep quickly freak me out... I mean, don't they have thoughts?" - Unknown
- “Some people can't sleep because they have insomnia. I can't sleep because I have Internet." - Unknown
- “When you wake up at 6 in the morning, you close your eyes for 5 minutes and it's already 6:45. When you're at work and it's 2:30, you close your eyes for 5 minutes and it's 2:31." - Unknown
- "I already want to take a nap tomorrow." - Unknown
- "I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot, sleep for a while, and then wake up beautiful." - Unknown
- “Sleeping on my keyboard. If I answer, I'm talking in my sleep." - Unknown
- “I think it is good that books still exist, but they do make me sleepy." - Frank Zappa
- “Me: Please let me sleep! Brain: Nope, we have to stay up together and go over every bad life decision we have made so far." - Unknown
- “I can't sleep good when I know the food is feeling cold in the fridge." - Unknown
- “I finally got 8 hours of sleep. Took me four days, but whatever." - Unknown
- “Just because I'm awake doesn't mean I'm ready to do things." - Unknown
- “Your eyes water when you yawn because you miss your bed and it makes you sad." - Unknown
- “I'm not always annoying, sometimes I sleep too." - Unknown
- "They call it ""fell asleep"" but it should be more like ""entered a mental state of regeneration." - Unknown
- “If there’s one thing these sleep quotes get right, it’s that nothing is better than sleep." - Reader's Digest
- "Laugh and the world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone." - Anthony Burgess
- "Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree something is wrong." - George Carlin
Shakespeare Sleep Quotes
- Why then, O brawling love! O loving hate! O any thing, of nothing first create! O heavy lightness, serious vanity, Misshapen chaos of well-seeming forms, Feather of lead, bright smoke, cold fire, sick health, Still-waking sleep, that is not what it is! This love feel I, that feel no love in this.
- What, all so soon asleep! I wish mine eyes Would, with themselves, shut up my thoughts.
- What early tongue so sweet saluteth me? Young son, it argues a distemper'd head So soon to bid good morrow to thy bed: Care keeps his watch in every old man's eye, And where care lodges, sleep will never lie; But where unbruised youth with unstuff'd brain Doth couch his limbs, there golden sleep doth reign.
- We are such stuff as dreams are made on; and our little life is rounded with a sleep.
- To die: - to sleep: No more; and, by a sleep to say we end The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks That flesh is heir to, 'tis a consummation Devoutly to be wished.
- To die, to sleep - To sleep, perchance to dream - ay, there's the rub, For in this sleep of death what dreams may come.
- To be, or not to be, that is the question: Whether 'tis Nobler in the mind to suffer The Slings and Arrows of outrageous Fortune, Or to take Arms against a Sea of troubles, And by opposing end them: to die, to sleep No more; and by a sleep, to say we end The Heart-ache, and the thousand Natural shocks That Flesh is heir to? 'Tis a consummation Devoutly to be wished. To die to sleep, To sleep, perchance to Dream; Aye, there's the rub.
- Tis dangerous to take a cold, to sleep, to drink; but I tell you, my lord fool, out of this nettle, danger, we pluck this flower, safety.
- There's little of the melancholy element in her, my lord: she is never sad but when she sleeps; and not ever sad then; for I have heard my daughter say, she hath often dreamt of unhappiness, and waked herself with laughing.
- The deep of night is crept upon our talk, And Nature must obey necessity.
- Sir, in my heart there was a kind of fighting That would not let me sleep.
- Methought I heard a voice cry 'Sleep no more! Macbeth does murder sleep', the innocent sleep, Sleep that knits up the ravell'd sleeve of care, The death of each day's life, sore labour's bath, Balm of hurt minds, great nature's second course, Chief nourisher in life's feast...
- Love's stories written in love's richest books. To fan the moonbeams from his sleeping eyes.
- If I may trust the flattering truth of sleep, My dreams presage some joyful news at hand. My bosom's lord sits lightly in his throne, And all this day an unaccustomed spirit Lifts me above the ground with cheerful thoughts.
- He that sleeps feels not the tooth-ache.
- He that is thy friend indeed, He will help thee in thy need: If thou sorrow, he will weep; If thou wake, he cannot sleep: Thus of every grief in heart He with thee does bear a part. These are certain signs to know Faithful friend from flattering foe.
- For some must watch, while some must sleep So runs the world away.
- For in that sleep of death what dreams may come.
- Enjoy the honey-heavy dew of slumber.
- Drink, sir, is a great provoker of three things . . . nose-painting, sleep, and urine. Lechery, sir, it provokes, and unprovokes; it provokes the desire, but it takes away the performance.
- Be not afeard; the isle is full of noises, Sounds, and sweet airs, that give delight and hurt not. Sometimes a thousand twangling instruments Will hum about mine ears; and sometime voices, That, if I then had waked after long sleep, Will make me sleep again: and then, in dreaming, The clouds methought would open, and show riches Ready to drop upon me; that, when I waked, I cried to dream again.
- Are you sure/That we are awake? It seems to me/That yet we sleep, we dream.
- And sleep, that sometime shuts up sorrow's eye, Steal me awhile from mine own company.
- A knavish speech sleeps in a fool's ear.
Wise Sleep Quotes
- “Sleep is the best meditation.” – Dalai Lama
- “A day without a nap is like a cupcake without frosting.” – Terri Guillemets
- “Your future depends on your dreams, so go to sleep.” – Mesut Barazany
- “The minute anyone’s getting anxious I say, ‘You must eat and you must sleep.’ They’re the two vital elements for a healthy life.” – Francesca Annis
- “A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the doctor’s book.” – Irish Proverb
- “The amount of sleep required by the average person is five minutes more.” – Wilson Mizener
- “Sleep is the best meditation.” – Dalai Lama
- “Man is a genius when he is dreaming.” – Akira Kurosawa
- “I don’t know why it should be, I am sure; but the sight of another man asleep in bed when I am up, maddens me.” – Jerome K. Jerome
- “Good night – may you fall asleep in the arms of a dream, so beautiful, you’ll cry when you awake.” – Michael Faudet
Poetic Sleep Quotes
- “What hath night to do with sleep?” – John Milton
- “You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” – Dr. Seuss
- “I want to be like a caterpillar: eat a lot, sleep for a while, wake up beautiful.” – Anonymous
- “I went to bed and woke in the middle of the night thinking I heard someone cry, thinking I myself was weeping, and I felt my face and it was dry. Then I looked at the window and thought: Why, yes, it’s just the rain, the rain, always the rain, and turned over, sadder still, and fumbled about for my dripping sleep and tried to slip it back on.” – Ray Bradbury
- “A well-spent day brings happy sleep.” – Leonardo da Vinci
- “A ruffled mind makes a restless pillow.” – Charlotte Bronte
- “Without enough sleep, we all become tall two-year-olds.” – JoJo Jensen
- “When every inch of the world is known, sleep may be the only wilderness that we have left.” – Louise Erdrich
- “We count it as a certainty that everyone naps in paradise.” – Anonymous
- “No day is so bad it can’t be fixed with a nap.” – Carrie Snow
Can't Sleep Quotes
- You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. Dr. Seuss
- Without enough sleep, we all become tall two-year-olds. JoJo Jensen
- Why can I never go back to bed? Who's is the voice ringing in my head? Where is the sense in these desperate dreams? Why should I wake when I'm half past dead? Emilie Autumn
- When you have insomnia, you're never really asleep, and you're never really awake. Chuck Palahniuk
- When we lost I couldn't sleep at night. When we win I can't sleep at night. But when you win, you wake up feeling better. Joe Torre
- When I'm worried and I can't sleep, I count my blessings instead of sheep. And I fall asleep counting my blessings. Bing Crosby
- There is a time for many words, and there is also a time for sleep.” – Homer
- The worst thing in the world is to try to sleep and not to. F. Scott Fitzgerald
- The last refuge of the insomniac is a sense of superiority to the sleeping world. Leonard Cohen
- Sleeplessness is a desert without vegetation or inhabitants. Jessamyn West
- Sleeping is so hard when you can't stop thinking. Anonymous
- Nothing cures insomnia like the realization that it's time to get up. Anonymous
- Not being able to sleep is terrible. You have the misery of having partied all night. Without the satisfaction. Lynn Johnston
- Most of us can't sleep when we're starting to fall in love, same thing as we can't sleep when that love started to fade. Anonymous
- Life is something that happens when you can't get to sleep. Fran Lebowitz
- Legend says, when you can't sleep at night, it's because you're awake in someone else's dream. Anonymous
- Insomnia is an indication, not a chaos. Its like ache. You're not going to provide a patient ache medicine without figuring out what's reasoning the pain. Judith Owens
- Insomnia is a gross feeder. It will nourish itself on any kind of thinking, including thinking about not thinking. Clifton Fadiman
- If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there worrying. It's the worry that gets you, not the lack of sleep. Dale Carnegie
- I've always envied people who sleep easily. Their brains must be cleaner, the floorboards of the skull well swept, all the little monsters closed up in a steamer trunk at the foot of the bed. David Benioff
- I'm so tired, but I can't sleep. Standing on the edge of something much too deep. Sarah McLachlan
- I only sleep with people I love, which is why I have insomnia. Emilie Autumn
- I haven't been to sleep for over a year. That's why I go to bed early. One needs more rest if one doesn't sleep. Evelyn Waugh
- I can't sleep. There is a woman stuck between my eyelids. I would tell her to get out if I could. But there is a woman stuck in my throat. Eduardo Galeano
- His insomnia was so bad, he couldn't sleep during office hours. Arthur Baer
- Dear mind, please stop thinking so much at night, I need to sleep. Kushand Wizdom
- Can't connect, I haven't slept, am I crazy? Fall so deep and I can't sleep, I'm slipping into hazy. Kaskade
- At night when I can't sleep, I play blackjack online until I get tired or I lose my money. Nicky Hilton
- A little insomnia is not without its value in making us appreciate sleep, in throwing a ray of light upon that darkness. Marcel Proust
- A good cop can't sleep because he's missing a piece of the puzzle. And a bad cop can't sleep because his conscience won't let him. Ellie Burr
- “Why can I never go back to bed? Whose is the voice ringing in my head? Where is the sense in these desperate dreams? Why should I wake when I’m half past dead?” – Emilie Autumn
- “When you have insomnia, you’re never really asleep, and you’re never really awake.” – From the movie Fight Club, based on the novel by Chuck Palahniuk
- “Thinking of you keeps me awake, and dreaming of you keeps me asleep.” - Anonymous
- “There are twelve hours in the day, and above fifty in the night.” – Marie de Rabutin-Chantal
- “There are times when the bed is the only place on earth where peace is to be had.” – Richard Llewellyn
- “The worst thing in the world is to try to sleep and not to.” – F. Scott Fitzgerald
- “The only time I have problems is when I sleep.” – Tupac Shakur
- “The night is the hardest time to be alive and 4 am knows all my secrets.” - Anonymous
- “The last refuge of the insomniac is a sense of superiority to the sleeping world.” – Leonard Cohen
- “The hardest thing is to go to sleep at night, when there are so many urgent things needing to be done.” – Donald Knuth
- “The best bridge between despair and hope is a good night’s sleep.” – E. Joseph Cossman
- “Sleeplessness is a desert without vegetation or inhabitants.” – Jessamyn West
- “Sleeping is so hard when you can’t stop thinking about someone” - Anonymous
- “Sleeping is so hard when you can’t stop thinking about someone.” - Anonymous
- “Sleep is such a luxury, which I can’t afford.” - Anonymous
- “Man should forget his anger before he lies down to sleep.” – Mahatma Gandhi
- “Life is something that happens when you can’t get to sleep.” – Fran Lebowitz
- “Life is something that happens when you can’t get to sleep.”
- “Legend says, when you can’t sleep at night, it’s because you’re awake in someone else’s dream.”
- “Insomnia is a gross feeder. It will nourish itself on any kind of thinking, including thinking about not thinking.” – Clifton Fadiman
- “If you can’t sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there and worrying. It’s the worry that gets you, not the loss of sleep.” – Dale Carnegie
- “I’m an insomniac, my mind works the night shift.” – Pete Wentz, Gray
- “I think sleep’s really important. I value it as much as waking up and having a full day.” – Jena Malone
- “I sleep and sleep and sleep, yet I still have an unquenchable thirst for it.” – Maria Elena
- “I only sleep with people I love, which is why I have insomnia.” – Emilie Autumn
- “I can’t go to sleep. You will always be on my mind, even if you are not with me.” - Anonymous
- “Every closed eye is not sleeping, and every open eye is not seeing.” - Anonymous
- “A ruffled mind makes a restless pillow.” – Charlotte Brontë
